Craving + Creating: Giving Yourself Permission to Want

February 01, 2013

This week, I’ve been thinking a lot about space.

I’ve been salivating over the concept of wide open calendars and hours to write and dream.

I’ve been dreaming about empty inboxes and really happy customers.

I’ve been searching for space to move and stretch, cook luxuriously with my sweetheart, eat without multi-tasking, sleep until I’m ready to wake up, and create things that feel really good to create.

And, I keep bucking up against the same thought that I imagine many of you are thinking about right now…

I only have 24 hours in the day.

We say:

There is so much to do! My to do list is a mile long. My family needs ______. My spouse expects ______. My job demands _______.

We tell ourselves that what we want is impossible or out of reach. We tell ourselves that what might be good for everyone else, just isn’t in the cards for us.

How do we give ourselves permission to want what we want?

When I’m telling myself that there are only 24 hours in the day or that I am already booked up with fulfilling every else’s needs – I am shutting myself down. I am telling myself in no uncertain terms: stop right there – you are asking for something that you don’t deserve.

In that moment, I am putting the cap firmly on my creativity, wrangling my dreams.

And I’m calling it being realistic.

Over time, my dreams react by becoming smaller or more hesitant. They timidly peek out to see what kind of mood I’m in. They make themselves palatable and reasonable to keep from upsetting me.

How many times a day does this happen to us?

How often do we realize that we want something – something delicious and fantastic, something that would dramatically improve our lives –  and then tell ourselves, simply, no?

It doesn’t matter what it is that we are craving in the moment. Too many of us have gotten in the habit of keeping ourselves rational, without bounds, and tethered to a life constricted by rules that don’t fit us.

When we think about wanting to create a life for ourselves that is a better fit, a life that is full to the brim of things that light us up, energize us, and make us feel good to the core – we need to start giving ourselves permission to crave.

What has been dancing around in the back of your mind?

If you were really honest, what do you want for yourself?

What are you yearning for?

What might you do if no one ever told you what to do?

Deciding to plug into and becoming an active participant in your life takes practice. It begins with noticing whatever it is that you are craving. It begins with giving yourself permission to want. 

Today, ask yourself, what am I truly craving? What am I waiting for permission to do? Where does my life need a little re-authoring?

Give yourself that permission.