Grounding Yourself in Self-Love

Too often, when we feel as though we are a work in progress, we succumb to the belief that we aren’t worth rejoicing until we _________.  We require ourselves to follow strict plans: monitoring our eating, chaining ourselves to the treadmill every single day, or refusing to acknowledge compliments given to us by strangers because we haven’t reached our steadfast goals.

We make ourselves miserable with all of that trying.

Trying to become something that we aren’t, yet. Trying to become something better than we are today. Trying to leave the life we have behind, and earn ourselves a life worth being proud of.

When you make these kinds of plans, inherently you are telling yourself that who you are, right now, today is: unworthy, unlovable, unacceptable, and ugly.

You are telling yourself that you do not deserve living your life out loud by taking up space in the world, asking for what you want and need, or pursuing the things that you love.

Instead, you are putting yourself through the wringer for what you have not been able to become, yet.

What if who you are today is all that you’re going to get?

What if you lose a ton of weight, find the “perfect” spouse, or get the job of a lifetime – only to find out that you still feel miserable? How could that possibly BE?

We are all works in progress, moving along the trajectory of our lives learning from our mistakes and distilling our preferences as we go. And yet, at every point in that process, we are a person who is: whole, thoughtful, intelligent, beautiful, and worthy of a wonderful life.

You are worthy of a beautiful life. Today. Right now.

Many people believe that loving themselves, as they are, is the anti-thesis of wanting to change something. They’ll say, “How can I love this?” while pinching the skin on their stomach, or become offended when you suggest that they could even be deserving of such kindness and compassion before their transformation is complete.

You are worth loving yourself completely, even when you are in the process of transformation.

When the backbone of transformation is self-love, your experience of the journey is radically different. You get up and do what needs to be done, because you believe in your heart that you deserve to be happier, healthier, and more profoundly satisfied with your life.

You exercise, not because you’re afraid of gaining weight, but because you know in your heart that moving your body stabilizes your moods, gives you energy, and makes you feel like a human being again.

You eat discerningly, not because you are on a restrictive diet plan, but because you love the way you feel when you’ve made food choices that are in line with your needs.

You make time for your partner, not out of the guilt that you feel for never wanting to be intimate in this body, but because you deserve the pleasure and connection of being close to the one you love.

When you act from a place of self-acceptance, there is no struggle because there is no wrong answer. {tweet this}

You will not get it perfect all the time. None of us will. But, until we stop allowing our fear of imperfection keep up from putting one foot in front of the other to try out new and exciting possibilities – we will always be stuck here, mired down in our own fear of getting it wrong and mistrust in ourselves.

Don’t wait.  The celebration is now – is wherever you are – because you are already a phenomenal, gorgeous, amazing woman.

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8 thoughts on “Grounding Yourself in Self-Love”

  1. Thank you for these words. I did go through the experience of losing weight and discovering that, while my body looked different, the inside of my mind looked the same – still full of self-doubt. I will be coming back to these words.

  2. Thanks Mara, I was just thinking about this the other day so it is comforting to know others feel the same. I have been putting off buying clothes until I get to the right shape but hate feeling frumpy. Great to get a reminder that I deserve to look good now too.

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